A few minutes later, the guy started calling the little girl over, and reaching for her as she ran by. I just assumed he knew the couple, but I was wrong. The dad started giving him angry looks. A bit later, he overheard her name, so he started calling her over by her name. Next, he started asking her if she wanted to go outside and play. He finally asked the parents if he could take her outside, which was met with a definative “NO!”

At that point, I was called to the window, glad to be away from that guy. Was I sitting next to a pedophile?!

During the Carboniferous Period (about 360-300 million-years-ago), the Earth was quite a different place. Due to a massive abundance of conifer trees, the oxygen levels in the air were as much as 32.5% (the current levels are only about 21%). Thanks to this oxygen rich environment, arthropods, normally limited in size by a very poor breathing system, were able to grow to unprecedented levels of monstrosity. It’s quite normal to find fossils from this time period of dragonflies with close to three-foot wing-spans. While these dragonflies may have been the largest flying invertebrate ever to call Earth its home, it can’t hold a candle to a fossil known as Arthropleura, which may just be the largest land-dwelling arthropod of all time.
Few fossils of Arthropleura exist, and none are complete, but enough exists to clearly understand many of the basics about this creature. For example, it’s very simple to discern that Arthropleura belongs to the Subphylum Myriapoda. It has many body segments (as many as 30 have been estimated), and a pair of legs attached to each. Fossil tracks have been found in areas like Nova Scotia and Scotland that have the left and right feet as much as 19.7 inches apart. This measurement coupled with a fossil specimen measuring approximately three feet long have allowed an estimation that Arthropleura could grow to lengths of 6.6 feet (or more). From other fossils, we know that Arthropleura had “armored” plates on each segment, but further study has shown these plates to only be a few millimeters thick, showing that they were not used as armor, as an arthropod this large, in this time period, likely had no predators. Older interpretations of fossils showed a more round head, but it was more recently discovered that this was the first body segment, and the head was tucked underneath. The first pair of legs is tucked under the head and has been modified with fang-like pincers on the ends.

The general consensus in the paleontological world is that Arthropleura belongs to its own Class (Arthropleuridae), but is derived from primitive millipedes (Class Diplopoda). Often cited reasons for this connection are the shape of the body “armor,” the positioning of the head being tucked under the first body segment, and a fossil specimen found to have partially digested plant matter in its body cavity at the time of its death. All three of these arguments are quite weak, when examined in any detail.

The observation of body armor matching modern species of millipede is a fairly worthless statement, on the whole. The appearance of convergent evolution happens frequently in the fossil record, and in modern fauna. Even so, modern millipedes that possess plated armor have extremely thick exoskeletons, as much a 1.5mm on fairly small animals. Arthropleura’s “armor” was only a few millimeters thick, which when scaled up to the size of these animals, would be extremely thin, offering no protection at all.

The positioning of Arthropleura’s head appears to be a case of paleontologists looking for information to support their claims, rather than the present information forming a conclusion. On most fossils, the animal will not be preserved in its natural resting position; therefore, the fossil’s head positioning cannot be taken at face value. Upon my own examination of the fossils that involve Arthropleura’s head, I’ve noticed a very prominent feature of millipedes completely missing: on millipedes, the first body segment behind the head is enlarged to 2-4 times the length of the other segments. On Arthropleura, the first body segment matches the size of the other segments almost exactly (there will be slight variations as you progress down the body, of course). Minus this very pronounced feature, needed to curve a myriapod’s head into that placement, it seems the head is only placed there on the fossil due to the animal falling apart, or being crushed by substrate.

The most convincing evidence that Arthropleura was a descendent of diplopods was a small amount of plant matter found near one of the fossils. This was widely accepted for many years as proof that Arthropleura was herbivorous. A more recent discovery has shown that that association was made in error and the two fossils have nothing to do with one another. Any claims that Arthropleura has a known diet are, at this point, simply conjecture.

Upon study of Arthropleura’s fossil remains coupled with several articles on the subject, I’ve come to a firm conclusion that Arthropleura was much more closely related to centipedes (Class Chilopoda) than it was to millipedes (Class Diplopoda). I still believe that it deserves its own Class (Arthropleuridae), but the systematics of these animals need revision. Several features stand out to me as clearly chilopod features: antenna and head positioning, legs, skin thickness, and fangs.

One feature that leaps out at me immediately is the head of Arthropleura. While it is curled under the body in the fossils it exists in, as stated earlier, the first body segment above it is no longer than any of the other segments, thus giving insufficient ability for the neck to stay curved in a downward position. The head itself is flat and oval shaped. Also, the placement of the antenna are more forward-facing, and larger at the base. The connection points for the antenna are between the eyes, as opposed to slightly above them. Each of these features is distinctly chilopodian in nature.
Another trait that simply can’t be ignored is the number of legs that Arthropleura possessed and their placement. In Arthropleura, much like modern and primitive centipedes, each body segment has only one pair of legs (millipedes have two per segment). Aside from simply the number of legs, Arthropleura’s legs were placed outward, moving out from the body at 90°, then downward towards the ground. This is true of all known centipedes, but only about 5-10% of millipedes (the rest have legs that move out from the body at almost straight down from the body to the ground like brush bristles). These two key leg traits point strongly to chilopod roots.

As discussed earlier, the “armor” of Arthropleura was much to thin to give any protection at all. Instead, it likely acted much like the thin skin on centipedes: to allow water to diffuse easily in and out. With the extremely humid conditions during this time period, it’s not a large leap to think that Arthropleura was using this same survival strategy that modern centipedes in extremely humid climates use.
The most damning evidence that Arthropleura was of chilopod decent and not diplopod were its modified legs that contained fangs. This exact feature is present in all known centipedes, but not a single millipede. Both use a chemical defense mechanism, but millipedes are quite different. Millipedes release a cyanotoxin through pores near their legs along the entire length of their bodies. Centipedes do not possess this ability, but are able to inject strong venom through fangs that are a modified pair of legs on the first body segment behind the head.

Occam’s Razor states that the simplest answer is likely the correct one. As such, it makes much more sense for Arthropleura to evolve from an animal possessing so many traits it shares– namely an animal from Chilopoda– than it does to evolve from something that it shares very few traits with– an animal from Diplopoda– which would require it to evolve to be nearly identical to something unrelated.  Presented all the evidence, along with my expert knowledge on myriapods, I’d like to present that Arthropleuridae is best classified as a class of animals derived from Class Chilopoda.

For example: At school recently, the testing center made a mistake. They gave me the wrong Chemistry test. I was asked what number I needed to take, and I said I didn’t know, but it was the one dropped off that morning for me with my name on it. I was given the one for the week before, didn’t remember it, and wasted two hours on it. When I told them they gave me the wrong test, I expected to get something along the lines of “Oh no,” or “Sorry,” or even just “That sucks!” Instead, I got, “We just gave you whatever YOU asked for,” with no eye contact.

I’m the one with autism, here. I’ll be avoiding the eye contact, thanks.

I’ve developed a theory about this. Let me know if I sound crazy, here, but I do think I’m on to something.

Empathy is a myth. It simply doesn’t exist in most people. The reason most people will relate to others is that their experiences are so normal and routine that they’ve both experienced them. They only relate to it because it’s something that they’ve already done or been through. This is why NTs will not feel any empathy towards someone with autism.

People with autism usually do feel empathy towards everyone because we’re told so often that we don’t and that it’s bad, so we spend so much time dwelling on it that we learn to be hyper sensitive to the feelings of others. We may not know how not to offend someone, but we’ll feel like crap when we do. Empathy in us is a learned skill that we’re told to use.

So NTs only feel empathy because it’s a shared experience. Unless they learn to feel empathy, they won’t relate to those that are different than them (explaining hate-crimes, etc). Aspies (et all) feel empathy because they’re taught to feel embarrassed if they don’t.

Thoughts?

I’m disabled and in college. As such, I need accommodations– more than I’d prefer to have, honestly. I’m in the disability services office at least once a week, and sometimes much more. I know everyone in that office (which is a big deal for an aspie), and they know me.

One of my favorite people there is A (remember, no names). A seemed to be the intermediary for everyone in the office. A booked appointments for B, C, and D. A organized all the paperwork about the students. A talked with all the students who would come in. A proctored tests for students that needed things the testing center couldn’t provide. A did a phenomenal job and was always positive and calm, but almost everyone in the office treated A like crap (from what I witnessed) and blamed A for anything that went wrong (A’s fault or not). A did all of this for very, very little pay (as A told me when we went out for lunch once). A week ago, A quit working for my college, and went back to an old job that paid better with much less work. I can understand that choice completely.

The department still hasn’t replaced A, and I think they’re starting to realize that they took A for granted. Things really aren’t the same.

This semester, I’m taking a class on Music Appreciation. I need 6 Humanities credits, and it seemed nice and relaxed being a musician with a lifetime of training and experience. I was right, and I love the class. I’ve learned a few neat things I didn’t know ahead of time, and otherwise it’s been very easy. No studying or note taking needed. The tests are a different issue, though. Part of each test requires me to listen to 30 second clips of songs and identify the composer and the title. I’m only allowed to hear each one once. Due to that last caveat, I cannot just be given a CD player in the test center to test at my own leisure. I have to go to Disability Services and have my exam proctored there.

My first music test went swimmingly. A proctored it, and I was done in about ten minutes. We didn’t schedule the test, but I was able to walk in and take it because no one was busy. For my second test, it was proctored by B, as A wasn’t in for the day. B didn’t know where the test was, or what to do. It took a lot of effort to get it started, and a lot of stress on my part. This one was scheduled, so they knew to expect me.

Today, I went to take my third test. A has been gone for a week or two, at this point. I scheduled my test with B for 11AM, as I expected my Chemistry lab to last until 10AM and it would give me some time to cool down in between. My Chem lab was over at 8:30AM, though, so I decided to go get the test over with. At 9AM (after calming down from the lab), I went to the office and found it empty. No one was in any office or at any of the desks. I checked the white board used to mark when people are in or out and saw lots of the people listed as out until Monday. B (the person I scheduled my test with) was listed as planning to be in from 9-12 only. After several minutes, E showed up. E was shocked I was there to test at all, today. E did one of the things I hate where E would stare me in the eyes with a giant smile, trying to elicit some response out of me that I don’t understand, rather than answering a direct question. This is why I try to avoid E at all costs. E told me that F now does all the proctoring, but was at a meeting, then needed to be in another class. I’d need to speak to F about my test, but E had no idea when F would be back. I mentioned that I made the appointment with B and was expecting B to proctor. I was told that it was with F now, as B took the day off (making me wonder what the 9-12 only thing was about, even though it was past 9). I think I made it clear that I was frustrated by the situation, but I decided to sit outside the office and see if F was coming back.

At about 9:30, another teacher stopped by to pick up a test that was proctored in the department yesterday. E was still the only person in the office, and the teacher had to stand and wait a few minutes before being addressed. E couldn’t find the test and tried to tell the teacher to come back and ask for F later that day. He said he couldn’t come back by, and he needed to grade the test to give the student their grade in the class since today was the last day available to drop. After watching E struggle for ten minutes to try and find the test for this teacher and failing, I gave up on taking my test today.

Before leaving, I stopped by the testing center and told them the situation. The director agreed that without A, it’s hard to do tests in disability services, so he’d let me take my tests with them for the rest of the semester and we’d work something out on Monday. I told my teacher about this as I was leaving, and he was incredibly shocked, it seemed.

Being disabled, my life is already harder than other people’s lives are. I spend more time at school than my fellow students because I have to do all my tests and quizzes outside of class hours. Not being able to take a test on the day I planned to take it really throws off my day, and my whole week. This is extremely frustrating for me.

This is my life.

The past two weeks of my life have been hell. I honestly don’t know how I’m still getting by. In just the past two weeks:

• One of my two best friends suddenly stopped talking to me. Everything went from normal to angry very suddenly, leaving me quite confused. Looking back, I can now see that he was dropping hints for a while, but (no surprise), I didn’t pick them up. I hope things go back to normal, soon.
• My other best friend almost died, it sounds like. It’s hard to get information, as she’s been in the hospital. She’s not answering her phone (since she needs to rest), and her boyfriend updated her Facebook page with just a small bit of info. I can totally understand why she’s out of touch, and I hope she gets better soon.
• School just got ten times harder for me. I spent a lot of energy making a new friend this semester, which I normally avoid doing. She and I were study partners in my Chemistry I class, and lab partners. We worked really well together, and were planning to take two more classes together next semester. Yesterday, she unexpectedly dropped out of college for personal reasons (they don’t sound like her fault). It’s too late in the semester to find a new partner, nor do I have the energy to do so. I also don’t like working with people I don’t know in lab, but I’m too physically disabled to work alone (my teacher did give me the option since he knew the circumstances). Lab, today, wasn’t the most fun. I got paired with the exchange student no one else wanted to work with. He’s smart and  nice, but has a very poor grasp of English and a thick accent. I have trouble with light accents, so I felt horrible making him repeat himself so many times. I ended up doing 80-90% of the work today, anyway.
• The big one: Rachel dropped it on me just before bed last night (causing me to not sleep). I won’t get into the details, but we’re not moving to Texas, and I won’t be attending A&M. Not for my BS, anyway. I have to take all the plans I had, and connections I made, and throw them out and start over. I owe her one, since she moved out here with me four years ago, so I can justify that. It’s just so difficult for me to change plans I thought were so solid and worked out. I hate uncertainty and that’s all I’m filled with right now.

I could really use someone to talk to right now, but my two best friends can’t/won’t talk to me, and Rachel is working tons of overtime at work and not around much.

How have I not just given up, again? I’ve done it for less than this.

As most of you know, I have an iPhone and love it. Unfortunately, I haven’t had the best relationship with AT&T.

In an effort to save money, My fiancee and I went to a lower rate plan (450 minute family plan and limited text messages). The phone rep for AT&T said that based on our monthly usage, that would be fine for us. I don’t know what they were looking at, because we went over on minutes the first month.

A second call, and the phone rep insisted that I take the unlimited voice plan and it would only be $10 more than what we were paying. Because I was rushed and didn’t get to process what was being said, I agreed. It was $60 more, once the first bill showed up.

Another call, and this rep talked me into an 1100 minute plan, as we could pick five numbers to call for free. It reduced the bill, but not by much. This is where I drew the line.

When I got my iPhone, thanks to a letter from my doctor, I qualified for a disability plan: Text and Data only for $50 a month, all unlimited. I decided to go back to this, then drop my girlfriend’s plan down to 450 minutes and unlimited texts (she only uses ~30 minutes a month, but texts a lot). Since the regular phone reps cannot handle disability plans, they had to send it off to another department which would back-date it– I wouldn’t get a quote about the price due to that. The next two months, they screwed up the bill, so I had no idea what the charge was.

During this time, I tried a few things out for discounted phone service. I only call three people, for the most part. All three are long distance.

• A home phone with long distance would have been $45 a month, so that was out.
• I tried Skype, which worked out to $8.99 a month. The price was right, but the service was extremely spotty.
• I was recently turned on to TTY service, so I’ve been using that to call businesses and keep my stress levels down (it works WONDERFULLY!). It’s just too impersonal for the three people I actually want to call.
• I went back to AT&T to price my options and was talked into a Go Phone ($2 for unlimited use each day it’s used). It worked out to about $15 a month.

Yesterday, I received a correct bill from AT&T, finally. By switching to a disability plan, or cell phone bills went down a grand total of $10 a month. I was actually spending $5 more a month for a plan with no voice service, and a cheap-ass cell phone that charged me for a day if someone would let the voicemail pick up! Needless to say, I was pretty pissed off.

After trying to call AT&T’s call center with TTY service, I was disconnected six times (by AT&T). I guess they didn’t want their average call time to go up from it. Not exactly disability friendly, AT&T. I gave up on the call center, and went to one of their local stores. The person there was able to get us on a family plan with shared unlimited texts (saving $10 a month), and a 700 minute plan with free mobile-to-mobile calls ($10 more a month), breaking even. Why couldn’t this be done originally?!

In the end, while AT&T may have a disability plan that’s great for someone who’s on a plan by themselves, it’s an absolute joke for those in a family. It saves no money, in the end, and feels like a spit in the face from a major corporation.

I work In a retail store as a Electronics clerk. A friend that I have known since Kindergarten works there as well pushing shopping carts. He had a tragic automobile accident several years back and is now mentally disabled.

Anyway today I was standing near the main entrance and he approached me and started asking about the LED tv’s. We talked for a minute before a customer approached us and got right in my friends face and said “There are no more shopping carts out there, You need to get more!” She talked to him sternly as if disciplining a toddler. (She could clearly see his was special and seemed to thrive on telling him how to his job)

I was getting a little angry and was about to put her in place, and explain to her that He deals with carts in the rear exit where there’s less traffic. It isn’t safe for him out in the main entrance.

But before I could say a word He calmly replied “your concern has been noted and I dont Give a Fuck”

Starting this year, Oklahoma is slashing their budget. In return, they’re trying to get people to drop out of school and enter the work force (or give up) to keep their costs low. As such, I’ve been getting horribly abused by them this week.

Earlier this week, I met with my case worker to discuss the Spring 11 school semester. I brought everything asked of me, plus a note from my doctor about me having shingles and missing about 6 weeks of the semester, and their advice that I drop a specific class due to the stress it was causing me to attending it with someone who was stalking me. While I thought I was very prepared, what happened blew me away. I don’t want to go into great detail here, so I’ll post the basics:

• My medical paperwork wasn’t good enough. She wanted dates, the medical name for shingles, treatment, treating doctors’ names, etc. Essentially, my whole medical chart.
• She outright accused me of lying about having a stalker, then lectured me on “growing up,” and said that I need to get over my disability and learned to live in the real world like everyone else. Not only is this insanely offensive, it’s illegal. It’s akin to telling a paraplegic to “grow up and learn to use the stairs like everyone else.” While I can find ways around my disability, I’ll never totally beat it.
• I was yelled at for never attending a “job club” meeting. It meets once a month, and everyone attending works on their resume. I was never told this existed, but I’m expected to attend every month until I have full-time work. That’s going to be quite a while since I’m in school until I have my PhD. I will be missing part of a class each month to attend this.

It took me almost a week to improve the paperwork I had from my doctor, but I was able to pick it up today. I went back by the VocRehab office and into more abuse. After a 45 minute wait where I listened to her yell at a guy who stutters that she couldn’t make sense of anything he was talking about (causing him to leave, VERY angrily), I was subjected to:

• Being told my medical documentation still wasn’t good enough. While I brought exactly what she asked for, she now wanted a document from the urgent care that I went to early in the semester when I got shingles so bad that it was in my sinuses and throat. When I assured her I could get that today, she finally agreed to pay for my schooling.
• As a massive change to the previous two semesters, the tax will not be paid on my books. The tax is $39.11. When I asked, she said if I bought them in advance, they would have paid it, but since I’m buying them with money from them and only provided a quote, they won’t. Trying to understand the situation, I asked if I would be reimbursed if I brought back the receipt after purchasing them. She slammed down her pen, sighed heavily, and told me to stop being greedy, that $30 wasn’t a lot of money. This lecture went on for five minutes. It’s $39, not $30, and when you live on disbility, that’s almost 10% of my monthly income. It’s A LOT of money to me. I didn’t argue, because I was afraid I wouldn’t get anything, then.
• As we finished, she kept rounding down numbers. Not just pennies, but whole dollars. I’m getting about $15 less than what the quote should have been (not even counting them almost $40 in taxes on my books). I was very aware of this, but said nothing due to fear.
• When done, she said I would have the check on the 20th (after school has started). I asked her about what she told me earlier in the week, that they were writing the checks in office and her telling me I could leave with it the same day I brought her the more detailed medical documents. She accused me of lying, then she very slowly explained the  process of submitting the info electronically and a check being mailed to me, the whole time talking down to me like I was an idiot.

I hate this woman with every ounce of my being, after how I’ve been treated this week. I don’t understand how she can act this way toward me when I’ve done nothing to her. I would report her, or ask to switch case workers, but I’m afraid of retaliation. She’s worked there for more than 20 years and was recently promoted, so I’m sure she’s got several people who would gang up on me if I did anything to “cause trouble” (I hate that description of reporting wrong-doing).

I’m stuck. I depend on this money to attend school, right now. I hate being in this kind of position.

EDIT: I was planning to ask about gasoline reimbursement for this semester, as I have class five days a week, instead of three. My gas bill will be going to $120 a month because of this. VocRehab is supposed to cover this. I never asked because I was too afraid after all the abuse I received. Plus, if she’s arguing about the $39.11 tax on my books (still not sure how I’ll pay that), how would she react to a request for $120 a month for gas?

When I told the lady who worked there what I wanted, she seemed very impatient with me. The gentleman that helped me the night before was very nice. He told me to expect the lenses to take an hour to cut. The girl who was helping me on Monday said they’d take two-and-a-half hours. I tried to ask her why, as I heard it was only an hour the day before. She cut me off abruptly and said her quote was the norm and I was wrong. I was confused, but paid and went to wander the mall as long as I could tolerate it.

After picking up a few new long-sleeve shirts (since I outgrew my old ones from last year), I noticed that 70 minutes had gone by. Just in case the first time quote was correct I went back to the glasses store to see if my lenses might be done. I wasn’t being impatient in the least. It was just that given two sets of information, neither of which can be truly verified, I like to check when I can. I never got to say a word when I went in. The woman who rang me up told me bluntly that it would be two-and-a-half hours and not to come back until then. Yikes!

Because of how confrontational she was, I waited fifteen minutes past the time she told me before I went back. She still seemed upset that I was there. She went in the back to get my glasses. When she returned, she just handed them to me. No seeing how they fit, no adjusting them– just a “take them and get out of here” attitude. I tried them on, and was immediately dizzy. When I took them off, I first noticed that they were covered in finger prints. I’ve been wearing glasses for almost 20 years. I’ve never been given a new pair without the lenses being cleaned first– Never. When I mentioned that, she sighed heavily and wiped them quickly, then left the counter and never returned. I was still seeing funny through them, but decided it was just me getting used to them (even though it was my existing Rx). I wanted to wear them for a few days and see if I got used to them.

For almost a week, I wore these glasses most of the time. My vision never got used to them. I was always a little dizzy and disoriented in them. Today, I learned why. I went back to the store to return the glasses and either get them fixed, get another pair, or get a refund (wasn’t sure what I wanted, yet). A different girl was working tonight. I told her what was up, but not who had helped me. She took the glasses in the back to check them. She came back in a few minutes and asked if I had my Rx on me, as the original was never scanned in. I told her no, but that the pair I was wearing were the same Rx. She said they could check from those and took that pair back with her as well. She returned ten minutes later with interesting news. The girl who helped me (accidentally?) switched the lenses on my chart. This would be fine if my eyes had the same problem, but my left has perfect vision and uses a dummy lens. Also, the frames were slightly twisted, meaning that I was looking through one of the lenses at an odd angle. I didn’t say it then, but I may tomorrow, I think the girl who seemed so upset with me did it on purpose. I have to go back to the mall tomorrow at 1PM (UGH! CROWDS!) to pick them back up after they remake everything.

Why was this lady so mad at me? I never did anything to her. I wasn’t rude, demanding, or offensive. Was she bothered by my tattoos? I wouldn’t be the first time, but it would be the worst someone has done to me because of them (I drove a car in these things). Was it because of my autistic mannerisms? I’ve seen people get uncomfortable because of them, but never angry. Was it because they work on commission (I don’t know if they do or not) and the other guy got the sale, but she had to do the work? Is she just a horrible human being?

In the end, I just end up more confused about the social interactions of others than I was yesterday.

I’ve decided to list out the things that have happened to me this semester that have led to this choice. This is mainly so I can look back on it and realize just how overwhelming this is, so I stop taking it out on myself. During this semester:

• I came down with shingles. Twice. I was sick with it for an entire month total.
• My dog got skin cancer and needed an operation.
• My unemployment ran out with me still unable to find work, causing me to panic about how I was going to continue to pay bills.
• Another band threatened to sue me because they were using the same name as me. We worked things out amicably since I have been using it longer, but it was nerve wracking for a while.
• I’ve been having constant pain issues (nothing new).
• I got lost on toll roads twice, with no money, thanks to a malfunctioning GPS unit causing two panic attacks. The GPS manufacturer ran me in circles and finally said it was completely my fault for trusting their software.
• I’ve tried to make friends, unsuccessfully as usual.
• I went back on pain medication, out of absolute desperation, that caused serious problems with my autism symptoms, an inability to recognize objects, and hallucinations.
• I acquired a stalker in one of my classes. This person committed a felony and tried to drag me into it.
• I had to learn how to study for the first time in my life. It took another aspie to help me understand what others couldn’t explain to me. Until she did, I was absolutely clueless of what was expected of me.
• I currently have pretty severe food poisoning that has kept me from doing some group assignments for a class that I’ve been trying to do all weekend. It doesn’t seem to be improving much.
• For the past month, I’ve had a yeast infection that just won’t go away. Yes, a guy with a yeast infection. That means no sex, which means nothing to help me relax. I’m on a prescription for it, but it’s barely helping.
• I had someone buy roaches from me, then try to rip me off, then blackmail me over the course of an entire week.

I’m sure I’ve forgotten some things, but that’s already more than enough for other people to freak out.

I’m just under too much stress and pressure to continue to push myself so hard right now. I need to take a step back and breathe for a moment. This is the first time in the past five years I’ve had to give in to pressure like this, and I’m not happy about it.

I’ll still finish my other three classes, as they’re fairly easy. I just need to step away from the other one now. For my health. For my sanity.

EDIT: I also want to note that there have been a small handful of people that have helped me the best that they can. Two councilors at school, the teacher of this class, my advisor, two very close friends (who live in other states), and Rachel (when she has time, which isn’t often with her working nights now). To those people (you know who you are), you guys are awesome. Thank you. Thank you so much.